lies lies lies, they're gonna get you! - a rant about lying liars lying on craigslist, scams on craigslist & stupid internet marketers on craigslist

lying liars lying and scamming on craigslist

When I started this blog I swore to myself that I wouldn't focus obsessively on my intended target Troopal.com (my review of troopal strategies summed up in a short sentence: good product long ago...before being taken over by a dishonest, greedy new owner. *Company now going the way of the S.S Poseidon*) And what with all the seedy lying liars lying and scamming on craigslist, lo and behold, the Power of Irritation Compels me and I'm on to impaling something else.

(Name removed to protect the innocent) Blankety Hey Hey offers Benefits now!

Blankety Hey Hey now offers all new affiliates Medical and Dental benefits, didja know? Yes, it's so; It must be true; with my very own vision corrected eyeball I saw it on a craigslist job ad posting:

"Full Benefits" {bigger lies, bigger bank account}

Now, it doens't take a rocket scientist to figure out that when a job seeker sees the words Full Benefits that they are going to interpet that as "Wow, Medical and Dental and Vision!" Even a 12 year old can understand the implications.

Yes yes, I know what you reprobates are thinking, "But it's not that big of a deal...people can take it however they want {hehe|LMAO|drool}"...and oh, sure, anyone can take the devil's pitchfork in the bent position and still love it so long as it penetrates with just the right amount of moral relativism.

And after all it's just an innocent little "Customer Service Position" paying 25K per month {They're coming to take me away ho ho ha ha hee heee|uh huh yeeeah|omg a spider just crawled down into my panties!}

I mean, hello, common sense come in :: do you read?

It's obvious you don't for the life of you understand why on earth you're not making very much money these days. Your ROI is diminishing (because) people viewing your landing pages figure out within a nanosecond that 1) there...are no benefits included, 2) there's...no "interview" and 3) you're. full. of. caca. And, you know, this is all pretty obvious to anyone living within an inch of an I.Q over 80.

And this. THIS.
Customer Service Personal...
"Personal"?
I know you're American. I researched.
So what's your excuse you lazy, lazy jerk?

Getting this sort of ad to go live is a snap. It's not hard. There's no excuse for this laziness. You are either really stupid or really really stupid. You couldn't even be bothered to insert a comma between personal and start.
I hate you.

Letting slip a single thoughtless claim or two here and there - well, ok that happens sometimes - right? But these are not some of those some times. These job postings are written by lazy pathological liars who think everyone else is stupid; they only like you long enough to use you for monetary gain; in general they hold most people in contempt; they're the users of the world.

They prefer wallowing in their own bad impressions over being human—

—and listen, while we're on the subject of stupid: The World According to Moron #1 and Moron #2

Moron #2 concludes that Moron #1 appears to be having some degree of success

And what results, just as assuredly as a dog returneth tos its own vomit is Both Moron #1 and #2 base their imaginary bottom line on the mere presence of spammy ad copy and on the quantity and frequency by which it pollutes craigslist daily. Yesss, that's a great way to determine outcome {weeeeeee|honk if you're dumb as a post!|OINK!}

so Moron #2 then steals Moron #1's ad copy and uses it in their own job posting. Meanwhile...While Moron #1 and Moron #2 are busily out classing each other with stolen spammy misleading ad copy—post post posting—Our Father, Who Art of Algorithim is watching. Nevertheless, despite the dwindling ROI and the debilitating problems that come from repeating the same stupid mistakes over and over Moron # 1 and Moron #2 still don't catch on. Why? because they're too greedy to be smart. They're craigslist's version of Jabba the Hut. In fact they're so greedy that when the ROI begins to crumble before their own eyes — what do they do?

They come back 24 hours later using bits and peices of the same suspicious ad copy - giving birth to an even spammier looking nefarious junk campaign

Wait—what?
"* Critical Thinking – Using logic and reasoning to identify the strengths and weaknesses of alternative solutions"

What sort of jerk actually tries to attract people who are so illiterate that they believe that sentence? There's nothing logical about perpetuating this kind of stupidity. Now in all fairness since I don't have the full scoop I can hardly lay claim to possession of the entire Truth - but this job listing doesn't adequately inform the job seeker. This is nothing more than money flipping - which is fine if you really love living the lifestyle of a common internet hooligan. Live on...but for crying out bloody loud please have mercy on those of us with a brain and at least attempt to be creative and thoughtful.

Was "Customer Relations!!" such a compelling concept to you that it really required two punctuation marks?

Write some original ad copy and make it plausible while you're at it. I, for one, am getting pretty sick of being insulted by the same incoherent ad copy showing up for reuse for everything from cash gifting to dialing for dollars. Let this be the official beginning of the end of the Stupid Internet Marketer on craigslist.

There
is
no
excuse
for
lack
of creativity.
Ever.

*Yes, I admit, if these craigslist job postings were a little more creative then I wouldn't have much to write about; nom sain? This is just silly stuff compared to the real scammers on craigslist ...

Finally, and speaking of scams on craigslist, WHAT. IS. THIS! 

{sic 'em!|bon appetit!} The same 2006 BMW M3 Convertible ($2980) keeps showing up in the jobs category on craigslist in various states across the USA. I refuse to find out...I don't want to know...but I'm sure one of you reprobates has the answer.


I look foward to reading about it in the news. Sooner rather than later.

Gobble Gobble

{END TRANSMISSION}